The grind myth- and what actually sustains success

If you’re not in the world of personal development or online marketing, you may have missed this.

But if you are, or honestly if you’ve just been on the internet at all, you’ve probably seen the interview between Tony Robbins and Alex Hormozi.

Two very different generations. Two very different styles.

Tony Robbins, arguably the most well-known personal development and business coach in the world, has been doing this work for over 40 years. Alex Hormozi is in his 30s and has made a massive impact online through his marketing, acquisition, and scaling strategies, building and helping others build nine-figure businesses.

The interview was technically a podcast, but it quickly turned into something else.

It became a 90-minute coaching session.

What stood out to me most wasn’t the business strategy. It was the language.

Alex is known for the grind. Hustle. Push. Work harder. Sacrifice now so it pays off later. He and his wife are relentless workers, and it has clearly paid off.

But Tony zeroed in on something almost immediately.

The way Alex talks about work.

ony challenged the idea that success has to be painful. That you have to torture yourself. That grinding is the price you pay for winning. He talked about how the words we use do not just describe our reality. They program it. We hypnotize ourselves into belief systems without even realizing it.

And honestly, I saw a lot of myself in that.

I grew up doing concrete work with my stepdad starting at 12 years old. Hard physical labor. Long days. You worked hard, you suffered a bit, and that was how you earned money. That mindset stuck.

I barely graduated high school. No formal education. A dyslexic brain that sees the world differently. And for most of my life, the belief was simple.

If I grind harder, I’ll be successful.
If I suffer more, I’ll earn more.

I’ve lived that way for a long time.

It also reminded me of another belief I picked up early on. My mom used to say wealthy people were crooks. And if you accept that as truth, think about the trap that creates. If rich people are bad, and you are a good person, then how wealthy are you allowed to become?

Language matters.

That is why I teach this in my programs. Why I talk about changing front desk to Director of First Impressions or reframing roles so people see themselves and their impact differently.

So even though I teach this, watching Tony do it in real time was a powerful reminder.

Another big moment in the conversation was around push versus pull motivation.

Push motivation is when you are driven by pressure. Fear of failure. Fear of disappointing someone. The need to prove yourself. You are pushing yourself forward because you feel like you have to.

Pull motivation is different. It is when you are drawn forward by something that matters to you. A purpose. A value. A vision that energizes you. You move because you want to, not because you are afraid not to.

Tony talked about how many people live almost entirely in push.

Proving something to someone
Fear of failure
Fear of becoming like their parents
Fear of not being enough

That kind of motivation works, but it is exhausting.

Then there is pull motivation. The thing that draws you forward because it matters deeply to you. Tony uses feeding millions of people as an example. It is not about suffering for the goal. It is about being energized by the purpose.

Here is where I see it a little differently.

I do not think motivation can live outside of you.

 say this often in my trainings: Every external motivation has an expiration date.

Kids grow up and move out.
Careers change.
Marriages shift.
Businesses evolve.

Even good things do not last forever in the same form.

So if your motivation lives outside of you, it will eventually run out.

What has become very real for me lately is this question:

What is the internal thing that pulls you forward when the external stuff changes?

Now that the kids are gone.
Now that my wife and I are in a new season of our 31-year marriage.
Now that the business has faced challenges and shifts.

What is the internal driver?

When people have not clearly identified that internal driver, they often default to the only lever they think they can pull. Work harder. Add more hours. Apply more effort. Grind more.

I see this pattern all the time with clients. And when results do not move the way they expect, frustration builds quickly because so much of what affects their success lives outside their control. Team members. Patients. Customers. Markets.

You cannot control those.

You can control what is internal.

So here is the question I will leave you with this week.

What external thing has been motivating you, and is it also the source of your burnout, frustration, or overwhelm?

And what would it look like to build an internal motivation, one that does not expire, that fuels your business, your relationships, and your life?

That is where sustainable success actually lives.

Proactive, Productive, and Profitable,
Dino