Money – Let’s talk about it

Let’s talk about the big, green elephant in the room: money.

It’s long been reported as the #1 cause of divorce. But here’s the thing—I don’t totally buy it. (And no, that’s not just the saver in me talking.)

Money itself isn’t the villain. It’s how we relate to money—and how we relate to each other about money—that creates tension. Especially as business owners, where love, livelihood, and legacy are all wrapped up together.

So how do we untangle it?

It starts with three powerful concepts: your money blueprint, your money personality, and creating consistent space for what I call a cash conference.
(And don’t worry—I’ll explain each one.)

Your money blueprint is the belief system you inherited—usually from your parents—about how money should be handled. It’s the programming running in the background of your brain, often without you even realizing it.

You might mirror it: “This is how money works, right?”
Or reject it completely: “I’ll never be like my parents with money.”

Neither response is inherently good or bad. But the real trouble begins when your blueprint goes unchecked—especially when you’re in a relationship with someone who’s operating from a very different one.

That’s when those little disagreements about spending, saving, or debt aren’t just about the numbers. They’re a challenge to the very way each of you believes the world works. And when those beliefs collide, the friction can get real fast.

Now, if the blueprint is the why, your money personality is the how. It’s how you naturally behave with money on a daily basis.

There are four common types:

The Spender – Loves to treat others and feels a sense of pride in picking up the tab. Generosity and instant gratification are strong motivators.
The Saver – Cautious, responsible, and hyper-aware of every penny. Security and long-term stability are top priorities.
The Avoider – Ignores finances altogether, often out of fear or overwhelm. Would rather not know than face what’s actually going on.
The Monk – Believes money is a distraction from what really matters in life. Spiritual, minimal, and often resistant to wealth.

Knowing your money personality—and your partner’s—can unlock so much clarity. It’s not about changing each other. It’s about understanding the operating systems you’re both running and lowering the temperature in your money conversations.

And that brings us to the third piece: the cash conference.

A cash conference is a simple, consistent check-in where you and your partner sit down, review your finances, and talk about what’s working, what’s not, and what needs attention. No shame. No blame. Just open conversation.

I’ll be honest—as an avoider/spender combo myself, this did not come naturally. In the early years of our marriage, especially when we were barely scraping by, I used to just guess what was in our account. That uncertainty caused me more stress than the actual numbers ever did.

Eventually, I forced myself to build the habit. Once a month, I sat down, opened the account, and faced the facts. It wasn’t always fun, but it was freeing. Because when you know what’s real, you can actually do something about it.

A good cash conference isn’t about who’s right or wrong. It’s about recognizing your patterns, aligning your goals, and building systems that support both of you.

So this week, I encourage you to take three small steps that could create big breakthroughs:

Reflect on your money blueprint
Identify your money personality
Schedule a cash conference with your partner

Because the more clearly you see yourselves and each other, the stronger your partnership—and your peace—will become.

To better conversations (and fewer money fights),

Dino